EP 21 - What do you believe about money? With Samantha Kopelman
Are you afraid to make the transition from your comfortable job to the unknown world of entrepreneurship? Are you sick of having debt but not sure how to stop the cycle of debt?
Samantha Kopelman, a Money Mindset coach, loves to help her clients on both ends of the spectrum. Her focus is on the beliefs that create a scarcity mindset vs embracing the new beliefs with an abundance mindset. The idea that freedom comes when you have money is a myth. Freedom comes when you believe you deserve freedom and isn’t determined by an external number of measurement. Managing your money mindset is a choice. Join me as I ask Sam every question I could think of in our short time together. Learn from someone helping others create that transition in thinking.
Hello, and welcome to the Believe Crew Podcast; The Business IS You. I'm Jamie White, Founder of Believe Crew and your host, let's jump right in. Today I have with me in podcast studio, Samantha, a money mindset coach, I am so excited to have someone that talks about money mindset on the podcast. And I would love to hear how you got into this and what in the world made you decide to start money mindset coaching?
Samantha Kopelman 00:28
Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be on your show today. So yeah, that's a great question. It's been quite a journey, I must say, into finding money mindset coaching. Long story short, I kind of always knew that I wanted to have my own business, but I always had no idea like what it would be. And I worked in the corporate setting for quite a while and kind of would daydream about, you know, what it would look like if I had my own business, what would that look like to be able to work from anywhere in the world and that kind of thing. And then a very kind of synchronistic series of events, I found my business coach Anna, who kind of suggested coaching for me, and I was really resistant to the idea. I was like, Oh, I'm not a coach, no, I could never do that. Like I'm not confident enough, basically, every limiting belief in the book. I'm not the kind of person who could do that. So very resistant, a lot of resistance coming up. But I finally was like, Okay, I'll give it a try. I still had no idea what kind of coaching I would want to do. So I invested in a course kind of laying out the steps of starting a coaching business. And I think it was just one of the examples the woman gave, and the course is of a niche was, you could help women heal their relationship with money. And at the time, I didn't really know what that meant. But there was just something in me that was like, yes, that is what I want to do. That's it, it was like a full body reaction where I was like, that is what I meant to be doing. So you have for the last couple of years that kind of dove headfirst into learning about finances, money mindset, reading every money mindset book, I could get my hands on taking courses, working with coaches, and it kind of led me here to helping other women take control of their finances. I work especially with entrepreneurs, so helping them with all those limiting beliefs and thoughts and fears that come up around money, especially when it comes to like leaving their jobs, which is something I went through when I left my corporate career to be a full-time entrepreneur, I know how terrifying it can be. So just kind of helping women through that same process that I went through and come to the other side of it.
That's amazing. And I want to dig into some of the questions around money mindset. But before I do something that you said, really connected for me, because when you were hearing that little voice or feeling that in your body where you're like, Okay, something about this is really connecting for me. I felt that five years ago, when I was first getting started on this journey of coaching. And I had, I must have liked something on Facebook, you know, goes right? Oh, Facebook, scrolling, like, whatever. I don't remember doing it, but and maybe I signed up for an event, I'm not sure. And then I jumped on a call with someone I didn't even remember, you know, applying to be on this call. And they said, Do you want to sign up for this program, leadership coaching with the John Maxwell team. And I remember this was close to Christmas at the time. And I remember hanging up the phone thinking, I'm going to do this. I don't even know what I'm doing. I don't even know what I'm signing up for. But it's for me. And so it was I think it was like a $3,600 commitment at the time. Initially, you know, of course, there was more as I'm continuing to grow and develop. But this initial investment, and I remember saying to my husband, it wasn't like I was asking. Yeah, we're like, I don't know exactly why. But this is happening. Yeah. And then, and then after paying for it. Then I waited three months before actually jumping in. And the only reason I did jump in is because I had paid for it. You know? So some of those money mindset things that come up where I didn't want to jump in because they made you pick. Do you want to learn coaching? Or do you want to learn speaking, and at the time, I didn't even know again, I didn't even know why I bought it right. And so I couldn't pick a lane. So then for three months, I just sit there but because of the money that I made the value there and I was like, You know what, if they wouldn't have charged me that much, would I've just let that sit on the sidelines and never have touched it? I don't know. But anyway, it was meant to help however we do leadership. You know, John Maxwell is more of a leadership based coaching program, and completely in alignment with where I am today, but I didn't know it at the time. So I really love what you said there. And the fact that you were just following your inner wisdom and your calling and everything else. So when you think about the things that come up for clients when you're working with them around money mindset, and you said, you know, obviously, you've had to work through your own limiting beliefs. Oh, this is big stuff in relationships, partnerships business personally. Anything. What comes to mind as some of the major ones or consistent ones, or some of the things that people might be thinking about?
Samantha Kopelman 05:30
Yeah, that's a great question. So I love what you said about investments, because that's actually a big one that I coach my clients on, because it's scary, making big investments, right, like, as a coach or an entrepreneur, like, it just becomes your new normal, like, you have to kind of, it's a kind of leap, and the net will appear type of thing, where it's like, there's no guarantee, you're gonna get this money back, like, there's no guarantee whatever program or coaching program, you're, you know, spending money on is gonna work for you, or that you're going to ever get the investment back. So, there's definitely a lot of fear that comes up around investing, especially when it's like a big investment, maybe more, you know, bigger than you've ever made before. And this was something that came up for me a lot, because I was like, quote, unquote, very responsible with money, you know, like, I had a good corporate salary, and I would save most of my money, I had low expenses, and I was just like, No, I don't spend money on like, an unnecessary things, that's just not part of my identity. So then, yeah, when I started finding all these amazing programs and courses that I was, like, really excited about, it took a lot of work to shift my mindset around that and like, kind of expand my definition of what like a responsible investment looks like and kind of give myself permission to spend money in a way that felt good and aligned. And that wasn't just for like necessities like rent and that kind of thing. And I know, a lot of my clients have that problem, too, of like, I want to build this business. And they have this huge vision for what I want my life to look like. But I'm terrified to spend the $1,000, or the $5,000, for this program that I know is going to change my life. And there's this, saying, you've probably heard of that I love that the transformation is in the transaction. And it's kind of like what you said, it's like, are you really going to do anything with this information, if you're not paying for it, right? Like, there's a lot of like freebies and things you download that just sit in your inbox forever, and then you never do anything. So it's almost like those big investments are not just beneficial for the person charging it, but it's beneficial for the client to because it's like, you're asking them to step up in a way that they haven't before and to really show up, and they're much more likely to do the work and get the transformation if they've spent the money, right. So it's like changing your mindset around investing and what that looks like. And it's just like, changes the whole game. So that's a big fear that a lot of my clients have for sure.
I love that you started with that, in my mind went in three different directions. So I'm gonna see if I can, r all of them. Yes. Yeah. So I was thinking about one of my clients because I help people in addition to leadership development, and through leadership coaching, I also help people when they're interested in investing in self-storage. That's my background I love so surge development. And I love it as an investment opportunity, right? And so that's an easy one in the real estate world to say, hey, here's an investment opportunity for you. But I remember my clients being nervous, like, Well, what about in our area? You know, do what about investing here? What about what sizes should we do? What you know, and so all the questions that came up, I was comfortable. I had been there, I knew the answers. And so getting coaching or consulting from someone or paying from someone that knows, I knew that my clients were building something amazing because I wasn't worried. Right? Yeah, it was like you're going to rent them. And so they don't even have them built yet. And they already have people on a waiting list. And they're in the middle of almost nowhere. I mean, the population is very small. And but I'm so comfortable with the storage industry having been through it, that they're the fears are not the same for me. Right. So someone else that's been through that being able to say what, well, this investment, but having said that, that same investment might not work for someone else, because if we're not really called to do something, then buying something that's not for us. Doesn't, does that make sense? Like I just want to be clear about that. Like just because someone made the investment doesn't mean that it's meant to work out for them. It might be a learning lesson. But one of the things since we started with investment, the other thing that came up was the opposite, which was debt. Are there any people that you work with to help them change their mindset around debt? What I've seen in some that have debt, often it's medical debt. And there's this interesting belief that I've noticed where certain debts are, okay, maybe it's school debt, maybe it's medical debt, maybe it's credit card debt. But part of it is because they saw it with their parents, and so they don't want to change that trajectory. Right. It's like, well, this is acceptable. And I don't have other debt. Well, okay, but what about this? What do you see? When you're trying to work someone through? How do I shift from debt is okay to now? I don't want debt anymore.
Samantha Kopelman 10:50
Yes, I love that question. It's such a common thing. And I think a lot of people it's like, one extreme or the other, where it's like, you grow up thinking that is the devil and like, avoided at all costs. That's kind of how I was raised, which, like, I think it served me in a lot of ways, like being taught like, no, never going into debt. Because it'll, you know, ruin your life. So I was really careful. Like, I never I paid off my credit cards every month, like, I was super, super careful about that. It was terrifying to me. And then there's the opposite end of the spectrum, where people are like, totally fine with like accruing tons of debt. And like, they're just, it's just what you do, it's the cycle. It's very normal for Americans to have like 20k Plus in debt. Not to mention, you know, like you said, medical expenses, or paying for college. And it's actually one of my favorite things to coach people on. Because it's so great when you can reframe it and start releasing that guilt and shame around it. Because it's really hard to pay it off. If you think I'm a bad person, because I have this I made terrible money decisions. I'm not worthy of paying this off, whatever it is, and to just kind of release that and be like, it's okay, like, I'm, I'm worthy of paying this off. To totally reframe your feelings around it, even just the word debt, like it carries a lot of weight to it, right? It has a lot of stress and anxiety that it carries with it. And people often make it mean something bad about themselves that they have it. So I love coaching women on helping them release that shame, release their anxiety, and whatever they're making it mean, because it's so much easier to pay it off when you have that, right. When you change your mindset and your energy around it. It becomes like no big deal. Like of course, I'll pay it off, like I'm worthy of paying it off. Yeah, so it's definitely like a really, like loaded subject, I feel like but it's really, I think it's definitely time we talk about it more and like release that kind of guilt and secrecy and shame that we all have around it. Because you're so much more likely to be able to pay it off quickly if you kind of release the emotional side of it.
Jaime White 13:02
And then also potentially not get back into it. Yeah, not only pay it off, but then not repeat the cycle.
Samantha Kopelman 13:09
Exactly, exactly. Because if you haven't addressed the internal beliefs and thoughts and emotions around it, and you somehow do manage to pay it off, people often get right back into the same amount, right. So that's why I really like coaching people on like the inner like the root cause that's causing them to play out the same financial patterns over and over so that they're not just taking the mat action, and then getting themselves back into the same situation, right.
And love that. So again, more things coming up for me. So I know someone who is over 70 and has a lot of medical or not medical debt, but college debt and school debt, because she went back and basically had to get her doctor's degree to do what she wanted to do, which was actually not at the doctor's level of salary. And, you know, those conversations, I asked her one time and I asked her, like, why don't we talk about this more, and she's like, there's shame around it. Like, how did I not know that this was going to be, you know, part of my life, and how many people still have that college debt that they don't want to talk about the level of debt that they have. So I really appreciate that you pointed that out, because that is holding a lot of us back from making the right decisions by attaching meaning, you know, to the debts or to the bad decisions, bad money decisions that we made. But in addition to that, something else that you mentioned, was about how you'd been trained to save and how you thought that that was the right, you know, responsible thing to do and it and that, and that debt was bad. Right? Right. I've played the game since I was I think my mom bought the game. It was like $200, 20 years ago. It's called cashflow, and it's by Rich Dad Poor Dad and so I grew up with the belief that borrowing money for, you know, using other people's money. It's in conflict, right? There's the Dave Ramsey belief that debt is bad. And then there's the Robert Kiyosaki Rich Dad Poor Dad belief, which is that, you know, use other people's money and leverage it. And so I had taken the game, to my husband's family, and a couple of different places when we were traveling, and we were playing the game. One guy got he won the game, and like three rounds, I was like, Oh, my word, he gets it. And then the next place we went, I have never played the game so long, I think it was three hours, and they were still putting $20 into savings every paycheck. And I was like, Oh my God. We're not gonna get out of the rat race, by putting toys into savings every paycheck. And, and so it was this really clear visual for me of like, Oh, my word, this is the other option. Right? You know, but, but navigating all those choices. And then even just the other night, I was talking to somebody about, you know, the cost of all the different things like cost of all the insurances, or the cost of mutual funds, or investing and all the investments that we can make, and Term Life Insurance versus, you know, a whole life policy or something like that. All of these financial decisions, and we're being sold by people that are wanting to sell us their products and what they make money on? And then like, how are we supposed to get clear money advice? Just out of curiosity?
Samantha Kopelman 16:30
Exactly. Oh, my gosh, I totally agree. And I would say that the odds are stacked up against individuals, right. Like from the, from the moment you're born, essentially, like you said, there's like people trying to sell you stuff like you're sold the whole idea of going to college getting a degree and most people if they don't have support from their parents, they're already hundreds of 1000s of dollars in debt when they're literally starting their career. So like, we're just not educated on this stuff. And it's horrible that so many people get into debt so early without the proper education, right. And like you said, there's mixed messages everywhere. There's some people telling you to invest, some people telling you to save. And it really, I mean, it takes its toll on individuals, and it makes them feel like financial freedom is just not an option for them. Right. Like, it's, it's so early in life starting out and just being like, no, that's never going to happen, like I'm never going to be debt free. So yeah, there's definitely a lot of mixed messages out there, which is why I love, like, that's why I'm so passionate about helping people with their money mindset, because so many people don't realize it is your mindset, right? Like, it all comes down to how you think about it, and how you feel about it. We're just not taught that way. We're taught to have the, like scarcity, thinking of like, there's not enough I got to hold on to it. And it's normal to struggle financially, when it doesn't have to be like, it definitely doesn't have to be your reality. But if that's all you've ever been taught, then that is going to be a reality. Right?
I love that. So when I think about that difference between scarcity and abundance, I mean, it can be in anything, right? Any resources, it can be time, you know, people saying I don't have enough time, I don't have enough time. I just need to delegate that. Exactly. So that scarcity piece plays a role in money. And not only money, the same with abundance, but what are some of the things that you see, your clients go through the transformations that they make, when they start to be like, how do I have this abundance mindset? And is it just a choice, you got to get to choose abundance?
Samantha Kopelman 18:36
Right, right? It's I love I mean, I think everything about money boils down to either having a scarcity mindset, or more abundant money mindset. So like, it has two ends of the spectrum. And my goal is to help people kind of eek from the scarcity to the abundance side of things. Because it really affects everything of like how you show up in life and how you deal with your finances. Because if you have these deeply rooted beliefs that like there's not enough money in the world, and there's fierce competition, and there's not enough resources, and I have to work hard for every penny, and if you have all those beliefs, it's going to be reflected in your reality. Right? So I think there was like a study done, where people who kind of believed they were lucky and they had a lot of opportunities. When they walked out of a building. And there was like a $20 bill on the ground. They saw it, and then the people who had the belief that like, I never have any good luck, like I'm always down on my luck, nothing good ever happens to me. None of them saw it. So like at the very baseline, it's about seeing opportunities when they present themselves. When you have this abundant mindset of like belief in yourself and your ability to create wealth and belief that there are opportunities, you're going to see the opportunity so your brain is always looking for that evidence. And like if you don't believe it's possible, your brain just like shuts that off, right?
That makes me think of my cousin when we were little. And he would always go up to the arcade machines. And he checked for quarters, and I kid you, not the kid, almost always, there was money waiting for him to be playing games, he didn't have his own money to play the games. Because there was a $20 bill sitting on the floor next to the change machine that someone didn't realize fell out of their thing, or there was extra quarters left. And he he believed in the opportunity. And so he walked up, and he looked for it every time. It was just this simple, basic, you know, at a basic level, right? Yeah, that's on the higher level. Yeah. One of the things that's coming up, when I think about people that are wanting to shift from debt to no debt, and also, how do I get to a better place, financially with my money mindset, when you think about abundance in a way? I guess, here's the conflict that I'm going to try and communicate and see if you can see it or hear it and speak to it. Some of the beliefs are well, I don't want to say no, I don't want to say no to my kids. Is that actually a scarcity mindset in a way? Because somehow that's getting them into debt? Because they didn't actually have the money to pay it anyway? Or like, how do we navigate, wanting to be able to provide these opportunities for our kids or for I mean, oftentimes, I know that parents spend money on their kids when they don't make that level of investment in themselves. Right. And I'm guilty of that myself. And, and yet, that idea that I can't say no, or I don't know how to say no, I don't want to say no. Do you run into that, like where people are still continuing to spend? And how is that not an abundance mindset? In a way? Does that make sense? Yeah, that's such
Samantha Kopelman 21:53
a great question. And I think especially it comes up with parents, I think that's really hard. Like, I've been asked that question before, of like, how do I feel abundant when I go to the store, and my kid asked me for this thing, and I literally can't afford it. And I have to say no, and like, I never want to invalidate someone's experience. Because I know that that's really hard. And like, of course, you want to give your kids the world. But I would say again, it all starts with like how you're feeling about it, because only you can tell if someone is something is an abundant purchase. Like it's how it makes you feel. So for example, there's certain like investments, like maybe something is something you really want to do. But you know that spending that money is actually going to send you into a lot of stress around money, and that you it's going to make you feel worse. So that's maybe not something that you want to say yes to. And maybe buying that thing for your kid is actually going to make you feel amazing, even if it's adding it to your credit card debt. And that means it's like an abundant purchase for you. Right? So it's like, it's changing how you feel when you interact with money. And I think that's kind of it at its baseline. Because when you're always complaining about money, when you're always saying like, I don't have enough, that's such a scarce way of looking at the world, and you're gonna have a really hard time like attracting more money when you're always looking like playing the victim mentality. But it's just like shifting your language, your thoughts, your habits, your feelings around money. And like in that moment, it's asking yourself, like, how can I feel good about this, whether I buy it or not? Like, how can I shift how I feel? And then if you choose not to, it's like, how can I reframe it to be like, I'm choosing to invest my money elsewhere right now, or this is temporary, like how can you reframe it in a way that feels good instead of being like, Oh, well, this sucks, you know, which is a totally valid response. It's just about reframing it for yourself.
How often does it come up that there's an issue between couples or partners, like I think about business partnerships, and the relationship that my husband and I have had, I grew up where I got, I mean, when we went to the store, we usually got two or three carts. And it's not because we, we were, you know, gluttonous. It's because my parents were homebuilders. And my mom, you know, got through the lighting section, and she was at Menards. And she was still buying, because I had just gotten through one house, one department. And, and then the same one, we went to a grocery store, you know, sometimes it was two carts, because we had so many people over all the time, it was like, Well, you guys will get three bottles of ketchup while you're here, because other second to last us. And so, and financially, they were in a position where we could do that, but it was definitely more of an abundance mindset that I was raised with. And then my dad would look at opportunities with land and say, you know, how can I do that? And he would be like, well, maybe they'll maybe it'll be seller financed. You know, maybe I could just ask the owner if he'll if he'll let me make payments on it, you know, like, looking for those opportunities and those deals from the perspective I mean, we lived in a way like we were broke, because we looked for opportunities, if that makes sense. But it was definitely a different perspective. So then when Kevin and I get married, we have very different ideas about money. How often do you run into that? And how do you help people through that?
Samantha Kopelman 25:16
Oh, my gosh, yeah, that is so common, so common, because like he said, I love what you said about childhood, because that's kind of when it all starts, right? Because when you're a kid, you can't you have no way of discerning between like, Yes, this is what I want to believe, or no, this isn't what I want to believe you're just like a little sponge, like everything you see is true. And then as an adult, you're still playing out those patterns, right? Even if you don't know it, it's all subconscious. So like, yeah, if two, If a couple is raised in like a very different environment, or their parents have very different views about money, then it can definitely cause like issues in the relationship and what especially I see as like my clients, usually I work with women, and they're like, the ones who are kind of working on their money mindset and trying to be more abundant and invest in themselves more, and they're like, What do I do? My partner doesn't thinks this is all like crap, basically. And like, how do I get him on board. And I always think that like, the best way to handle it is like you lead by example, right? Like, you can't really force anyone to go on this journey with you, if they're just not about that life at all. But you can work on it so much yourself that they see the changes in you that they see how much better you're doing and how much better you're feeling about money. And they, yeah, basically leading by example, and it will rub off on them. And like certain ways, you know, like, it might not be always conscious. But if you kind of make yourself unavailable for that, like negative thinking, and just make it very clear, like I'm working on this myself, and I'm no longer available for complaining about money, talking about how there's never enough, that kind of thing. Like, you can slowly shift it that way. But of course, it's hard because like, you want to be like quality, you should read this book too. Or you should do this. And oftentimes, the status does eventually come around, right? But it kind of takes a while.
I love that you put the ownership back on the person that is coming to you for help. Because at first I was gonna say, Well, do you recommend a relationship coach, you know, as like the place to go, but really, you just said, Hey, let's, let's look at what you can do. And what you mentioned about oftentimes, the spouse does come along, I do believe that. Most times when we're connecting in a relationship, our inner child loves their inner child. And so there's some sticky things happen along the way. And so there, there's some different belief systems that we need to work through that we didn't know were going to be a problem. And I think of the story recently that I heard of another couple, and he shared their debt free scream on Dave Ramsey. And he said, eventually, he was interested. And he noticed that the book was already on the bookshelf. And so then he went to his wife, and he's like, hey, I want to get on board with this. And she's like, well, I shared that book with you a while ago, but you weren't interested. So sometimes it does just take believing, you know, that maybe right now is not the right time, right, there is going to be a time and if I continue to live, where I'm shifting my thinking, I'll be ready to help that other person along.
Samantha Kopelman 28:38
Yeah, yeah, I love
that you keep the ownership on the person that's coming.
Samantha Kopelman 28:45
There's certain things that are out of our control, you know, and that's like, other people's behavior is definitely one of them. So it's like taking back your own power and deciding how you want to live your life. And I know that's hard when you share like, you know, maybe bank accounts or that kind of thing, but just focusing on what you can control.
Do you have anything else that comes to mind when you think about the things that come up in money mindset, and things that you would love for people to know?
Samantha Kopelman 29:14
I think a lot of people find it. There's this period of time when you're working on your money mindset between the time where you're kind of releasing those old scarcity beliefs, but before you truly believe the new belief, and I think that can be really hard and a lot of people are like, but is there more than enough? Like they're trying to do these affirmations daily and trying to really ingrain it, but they're not like fully believing it? And I just want to say like, that's totally okay. Like, it takes time. And there's definitely like a transition period when you're kind of moving out of the old identity and into the new but you haven't fully embraced it. And my favorite kind of hack for that is just like, questioning the old belief like Is this actually true? Is it actually true I'm bad with money? Like, is this the ultimate truth, or it's just just something that I've told myself my entire life is, it's just a story I've told myself. And then what could be more true, right? Choosing a new belief that feels a lot better, like, I'm willing to believe that I could be good at money, or I'm learning to be good with money. And then my favorite hack is just like looking for evidence of the new belief in your life, right? Because the more evidence you find like, the more it'll actually feel true. So just making that like transition, instead of it kind of feels like you're playing pretend you're like, Wow, I'm not actually really good with money, though, like, my brain is lying. So just like making it as concrete as possible, definitely always helps.
I love that. And a couple of things come up again, for me, when I think about what you said about shifting these belief systems. I was recently at a seminar, and the person leading the discussion was a therapist, and she helped people identify their perfectionist challenges you could say. And she helped them by creating awareness around the fact that beliefs are created. But she didn't help them figure out how to change those beliefs. And she left everybody in the room hanging because she said, Well, actually, my schedule is full, and I can't help you anyway. And it was like, oh, no, I know, this is the whole point of coaching, right is to help people with that. And so this was a therapist that was saying, because they're like, what do we need therapy around our perfectionism? Like, what do we do about this? And she said, right? Well, I have a waiting list. And I'm full. And I actually don't even like what I'm doing. Let me at the microphone.
Samantha Kopelman 31:44
Yes, you're like, let me take over, please.
So when you're describing it, you're making it seem normal to shift a belief system to choose something new to look for proof that actually, the new belief is already there, you're already capable of being this person, you've already been this person. And here's how, you know, that's what I'm hearing from you. That's amazing. I love that. I love that we're giving people the opportunity to choose something new instead of keeping something we don't want to keep.
Samantha Kopelman 32:17
Right. Yeah, thank you. I think it took me a really long time to realize that, like you can, you can kind of get something in theory, right. And like, I think the farther into personal development you go, the more you start to, like go from, I kind of understand this to like, fully embodying it and being like, oh, yeah, this makes sense now. But yeah, we can really pick and choose our beliefs, right? Like our beliefs about ourselves, or beliefs about money. One of the things I have my clients do is like write down all their memories around money and all their like negative beliefs and stuff. And then once you really go deep into essentially your origin story of like, how did you get this belief? And how did this, how did this start, it's so much easier to like, go back to the root and then like, decide, oh, I don't think this belief is serving me to get to my goals, what would be a more empowering belief, and then just like really trying to ingrain, that new belief. It's kind of like, you know, that old thing of like, when you're looking for a new car, and you have a specific car in mind, and like, you start seeing that car everywhere, it's not that there's suddenly that much that many more cars on the road, it's that your mind is filtering the information around you for it. And it's the same thing. Like, if you have a belief that you're bad money manager, your mind is going to disregard all that other information and just pay attention to the evidence that you're bad money manager. So that's why it's so important to shift out of those limiting beliefs. And then it becomes so much easier to reach your goals, right? Because you're not like, it's not like pulling teeth. You're not like fighting against the current anymore.
Hmm, that really stands out for me. And I think recently of something that I've always believed that it was good with numbers and good with names. And so often I hear people say, Oh, I'm not good with names. It's like they excuse for why they didn't remember your name. Right. Right. And I recognize people, you know, I'm really good with faces, but I'm not good with names. Right. Okay. Well, what point is your brain going to start being good with names because you've been telling it for years that you're actually so my son recently came to me and he was like, Hey, I'm actually shifting my belief. I'm trying to tell myself that I am good with names. Definitely shifting things for me. I'm like many men will take it.
Samantha Kopelman 34:36
Yeah, that's amazing. And so empowering to you can to pick and choose what you believe about yourself.
Right, exactly. I know, I've always believed I'm good with numbers or I'm good with. So you know, this was back in the day you remember them? Yeah, no, no, but part of it came from my mom. I watched her you know, my dad would come in the house and he would say, hey, what's the number of the plumber and my mom He would start to pull up the phonebook and my mom would say, 7154205. You know what my dad would be like, Oh, you're annoying, like, I think he would say, How do you spell their last name? You know, because he was trying to figure out exactly where to find the phonebook. And she wouldn't be like, well, the number is and she would rattle it. You know, I saw that, right. So when you think about what you said, when, with clients writing the stories of origin, where did we come up with these things? They are all there. I know why I'm good with the calculator, and good with numbers and good with names because I saw it. And I believed it to be possible for myself, and I wanted it for myself.
Samantha Kopelman 35:37
I love that. That's so cool. That's so cool. I think like a big one that I see a lot is, I'm bad at math. I'm bad with numbers, aka that means I'm bad at money. And that's when I had them for for a long time. I like I was like, Oh, I'm just bad at math. Like I thought this all throughout high school. I was like, No, I'm not good with numbers. I like writing. I like English. I'm bad at math. And then in college, I remember I like reached out to a professor for extra help. And like, I ended up getting an A+ in the class. And I was like, Wait, is that not actually true that I'm bad at math? Did I just not like ask for the help I needed. But I see that a lot, where women are like, Oh, I'm bad with math. And then they kind of translate that over to money. So like you said, it all kind of goes back to the origin of like, where did this belief start? And then like kind of realizing no, like, it's not the ultimate truth. It's just like a story you've told yourself all those years. But I love that you believe you're so good with numbers. And that's like, so beneficial. I love that.
Well, the opposite was that I believed I wasn't creative, because you're in those math and science, and you're good with that kind of stuff. And I believe it wasn't creative. And then I was in furniture store at 18. I was running a furniture store with all these designers. And so I was continually saying, I'm not the designer, you'll have to work with the designer, you know. And over the years, I was around it long enough that I learned as much as you can. I don't, you know, consider myself an artist, but so many people around me are like, Oh, you're so creative. Well, it's because I learned it. It's not because I thought I was creative, you know, but, and I found the areas where I am creative, instead of saying, Hey, you want me to design your room, you know, no, I can help you in this in these ways, you know, and, and embracing that I am creative, but it's in a whole different Lane than other artists or something like that. I've seen the things that we can train on and things we can't train on. And oftentimes people say I can't train on character, you know, and so now we're gonna go deep in a different lane. But when you think about coaching and the impact that it has, then if people are healing, if they're getting help through coaching, believing, or even if a leader believes I can train on character, you know, how can we do that? It's really through a different leadership model. Can we actually train on these things? Or can we coach? What if? What if leaders became coaches, right, and the perspective that people could change?
Samantha Kopelman 38:01
I love that.
That's a whole nother level.
Samantha Kopelman 38:03
Yeah, I love it. So interesting.
Yeah. So when you think about the business that you would love to create in the future, and I know that you came into this, without the expectation that you were even going to be a money mindset. Coach, I love that you stepped into, you know, like you said, you used to think of yourself as bad with math, you know, five years ago, would you have ever dream that you be a money mindset coach?
Samantha Kopelman 38:28
Oh, my God, never.
But now, when you think about the future, and the level of impact that you can make, what are some of the things that come up for you is would be crazy cool in the next couple years?
Samantha Kopelman 38:39
Oh, yeah, that's a great question. I think I would love to, like, just teach as many people as possible about it, because it's something that I like, has changed my entire life learning about it. It's like kind of, like you said, about taking your power back, just feeling so much more empowered about, like, I can literally create any financial reality I desire, and it's not dependent on my job. It's not dependent on my business. Like I can create that by changing how I think and feel around money. So just like creating more courses, getting to a broader audience right now, I just do like one-on-one coaching. So kind of broadening that to, yeah, just teaching as many people as possible about it, because it's, it's honestly just so fun. Like, I love learning about it. I love teaching about it. I could read about this all day long. And I think that it can really change people's lives because it's not something that we're taught about at all. And having negative relationship with finances can really put a damper on every aspect of your life, right? So just like learning how to shift out of that is totally life-changing.
Well, I love some of the things that you said because I heard you say I'd love to teach. And when I think about the different personalities I love, there's a test called lifelanguages.com And one of them, which I'm guessing if you are potentially a high contemplator. And that means you have the gift of teaching. So stepping into that gift, right, even though and then the other thing you said is right now you are just doing one on one coaching, point out that that is some of the best and most amazing work. And we need playing, doing one on one coaching. So I definitely want to highlight that you offer that because I appreciate that, in addition to the idea that your gift is in teaching, and that you're meant to create a course that's great, that's awesome, you can create more impact, you can help people at other levels. And I want to point out that I love that you still offer the one on one. Because if you're not offering it any more than I'm going to hopefully find more people that are because doing that work. Like you said in the beginning, we can read a lot of books, we can study this, but until somebody else hears what we're saying that we don't know, we're saying and helps walk us through the process. I don't know about you, but I've read so many mindset books, and they have a lot of really good questions at the end of each chapter. And I don't do them.
Samantha Kopelman 41:03
Yeah, exactly. Never, like I'll do those journaling questions later.
Jaime White 41:09
And they're really good. No, there's no good thing. I need someone to ask me the question and to sit there while I think about responding.
Samantha Kopelman 41:21
Exactly. I love that. I'm totally the same way you need that accountability. Right?
Jaime White 41:28
Yeah, someone to hear what I don't know. I'm saying somebody did to call me out on my junk. You know, when I'm distracting. So anyway, I really believe that you'll be able to create because I know that you're investing in yourself and continuing to get coaching. So I know that you'll be able to make the impact that you're looking to make in the next couple of years in this way. It's awesome. Super exciting. Thanks for coming on.
Samantha Kopelman 41:51
Yeah, thank you so much for having me. It's so so much fun talking about all this